emotional wellbeing Mandy Kloppers

Who owns you?

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Who owns you?

Think about it. These three words can have a huge impact upon your life if you ask them regularly. Many people would automatically say that no one or no thing owns them but when they think about it carefully, the results can be illuminating.

Who owns you...really? 

Designer Goods

If you need designer goods to feel good about yourself or to feel worthy, it’s safe to say that designer goods own you. They have power over how you feel about yourself and you need to own them to feel valuable. It sounds crazy but it’s true. There is so much in the media that can contribute to us feeling inadequate and inferior. Don’t allow the media to have  a say in your self worth.

Your relationship/partner

Do you feel the need to always double check with your partner before making a decision- even if it is a small insignificant decision? When you feel that you cannot function as an independent person and think for yourself, you do not completely own yourself. Getting opinions is normal but if these opinions are required as part of the process and not seen as a bonus, there may be an issue. Learn to be self reliant and decide what works for you. Only you truly know.

Money/career

Are you putting off enjoying life now because you have decided that the future will be where you get to relax and be happy? Big mistake. Never take the future for granted – you may not get one. Learn to enjoy life as much as you can now. This doesn’t mean spending every cent you have and acting as if there is no future but putting off cherishing moments today for an illusory promise of future well being is silly and misguided. Practise mindfulness, be in the moment more and enjoy the small pleasures in life. The gift of life is in the moment called NOW.

Media/Government

Are you a critical thinker? Are you able to form your own opinions and not automatically believe what you are ‘fed’ by politicians and the media. Much of the information we receive is altered to be presented in the best light and there is ALWAYS another way to look at situations. If you remember this, you will always keep an open mind about what you are being told. DO your own research, check out Google but never allow the media and politicians to inform you solely. I am guilty of being a lazy consumer and accepting popular opinion at times but when I have taken the time on issues close to my heart, I have always found there are many ways to interpret the same set of facts.

Your fears

Is there anything you would like to do but have been to afraid to try? Ask yourself what is stopping you. What are you afraid will happen? Our fears are often mental monsters that creep around in our heads and tel us why we shouldn’t do things or why we need to stay safe. It’s time to see these ‘mental monsters’ are nothing but trouble makers that stop us from reaching our true potential.

Sit them on the naughty step far away, make sure you can’t hear a word they are saying and do what you want to do. It’s really that simple. Your fears are mental barriers. While it is good to do a risk assessment, too much analysing, “what if” thinking and endless consideration of the possible consequences will lead to stagnant paralysis. Research has shown that people regret what they didn’t try rather than what they did have a go at, even if the results weren’t great. We are much better at justifying a less than satisfactory outcome to ourselves than we are at never trying and wondering what could have been.

Nothing can be more scary that death and we have no choice about that, so pretty much everything else you try should be a breeze….

Your image

Is your image all important? Do you stop yourself from doing or saying things due to the worry of how you may come across?  If you are keeping yourself small in order to please others, be accepted or fit in, you are allowing your image to rule.  The real you doesn’t care about all that superficial nonsense.

So, who owns you? I hope that you own you. I hope that you can think for yourself, ignore what others think and be true to your calling – whatever that may be. The happiest people in life tend to be the people who know themselves well, maintain balance where ever possible and watch when external influences take over.

 

Mandy X

 

 

Mandy Kloppers
Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.

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