Ever wondered what to do before getting into a relationship? Unfortunately, most people start relationships without clearly discussing and defining boundaries. This is not healthy; here are tips to help you start before getting in a relationship.
Sexual Matters
It is one of the most important things you need to discuss before moving forward in your relationship. Sexual matters are an integral part of every couple’s life, and you must be comfortable talking about them. Before engaging in any activity, discuss your boundaries and limits with each other.
Be open about what you’re comfortable doing or not willing to do. If either of you isn’t okay with something sexual that the other wants to try out, explain why it makes you uncomfortable and how you can resolve it without compromising your values.
You should also discuss if you wish to use contraceptives, be sexually active and how you will go about it. For example, men can get vasectomies, or the ladies can use various pills. Though there have been advancements on this front, like Vasectomy Reversal and methods with more minor side effects, it is still a grave topic that you should consider discussing.
Finances
When you start to date someone, one of the most important things you need to discuss is money. You need to discuss your current financial state and compare it with theirs and what each of you expects financially from your relationship. Discussing finances early on can set boundaries for both partners, so they know where their limits are when it comes to spending.
Family and Children
When you are in a serious relationship, your partner’s family is integral to your life. Discussing how both families will co-exist is very important, especially if children are involved. This discussion can be uncomfortable, but it is necessary to set boundaries and address any concerns that may arise before moving forward into the next stage of your relationship.
It would help if you also talked about how having children will impact your relationship. Suppose you both agree to start a family, great. Discuss the types of parenting styles that work for you and make sure they are compatible with each other’s expectations. Also, be on the same page when it comes to things like discipline methods, child-rearing philosophy. And remember, not all relationships survive the stress that comes with having children.
Wealth Creation
Decide how to manage finances together. This is especially important if you have debt or destructive money habits that need changing, but it’s also a good idea for any couple moving in together. For example, if your partner spends all their paycheck on clothing and entertainment while they barely pay the bills each month, what will happen when both of you are living under the same roof? Discuss how to divvy up household costs, who pays for what, and when you share financial priorities.
Asset Building
Asset building is one of the most important things that you need to do when in a relationship. Asset building is one of the main goals for having an emergency fund and retirement savings, but you can also use it as part of your financial plan with your significant other.
Asset building should not only include physical assets such as real estate or securities like stocks and bonds; asset building has intangible assets such as educational attainment and work experience.
Conclusion
No matter where you are in your relationship, it’s essential to discuss the above-listed issues with your partner before moving on. If not addressed, these topics could lead to problems further down the road if left unresolved. Even though some of them may seem trivial or insignificant, remember that they are part of a healthy and happy relationship, and you should address it as such.
Image by Karen Warfel from Pixabay
Author: Mandy Kloppers
Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.
