Emotional Wellbeing

Self Improvement

Mandy Kloppers

How to be invincible

There are astute ways to be more resilient in the face of life’s challenges. Whilst theory is always easier than application, knowing what is needed to withstand the stress and strain of modern day life can help you to call on these abilities/skills when they are needed.

Here is the ultimate list of invincibility traits:

Nurture Self Belief

Nothing is more important to success than self belief. Self belief will carry you  through the doubt and bring you out the other side. This world is a great detractor from self belief but don’t allow it to wear you down. Say positive affirmations to yourself regularly. I say to myself things like, “You’re kind, you’re good company, you have a sense of humour”. I remind myself regularly of what I feel are my good points and I do my best to gloss over the negative critical inner dialogue that’s always trying to drown out the good positive thoughts. Self belief takes work, seek strength within for self belief. If you rely too much on what others think of you (external validation) you will struggle to possess self belief. Care about yourself and champion yourself and your ideas as there will always be haters and doubters. Just follow your own path anyhow. Self belief will help you to keep going when others have quit.

Keep Optimism alive

Stay hopeful even in the face of major adversity. That doesn’t mean you have to like what’s happening, but believe that better days will be around the corner. Hope and faith can help carry us through the tough times. We will feel far stronger if we tell ourselves we can get through whatever is thrown at us instead of catastrophising that everything is wrong and will never get better. Look for the silver lining, don’t give up hope.

Try to see the funny side

A sense of humour can go a long way to easing tough times. Of course it isn’t always easy to see the funny side but humour has the amazing capacity to lighten the emotional load. When we step back a bit and try to view life in a less serious light, it can alleviate stress. You can lighten the load instantly by having a good laugh.

Protect yourself

In order to maintain mental resilience, it’s worth learning how to protect yourself mentally, especially from people who drain you – negative people, controlling people and emotional vampires. They are everywhere and they can take a huge toll on your emotional health. Either limit time with toxic people and if this isn’t possible, learn to play the game. Try not to let their tantrums and difficult behaviour affect you. Let it wash over you like water off a duck’s back. You don’t have to take on their emotional baggage. Learning to emotionally detach in order to protect yourself is a skill that can be learned and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy teaches this skill. Watch what you tell yourself, watch your thinking (are there errors in your thinking?)– all of these can help you to protect yourself.

Learn to let go

Holding grudges will make you sick. It’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person that you hate/resent to die. While you are thinking about them and getting worked up and angry, they are probably living their lives whilst not giving you a second thought. Letting go can be hard but it will work wonders for your emotional well being. They aren’t worth the mental energy. Let it go. Let them go.

Make time for fun

Life doesn’t have to be all work and no fun. Having fun and down-time works wonders for our mental health. Balance is vital in life. Too much work affects brain chemistry and can cause more stress and depression. Get those endorphins going and improve your serotonin levels. Your body and mind will thank you for it!

Have a sense of purpose/values

Does your life have a sense of purpose or do you drag yourself out of bed and enjoy “Groundhog Day” once again? We all need to feel we are doing something that’s in line with our values and people who set themselves goals that they work towards tend to generally be happier in life.

What is important to you? Connecting with others is one of the best things you can do to feel happy and allows your body to release oxytocin.

Mandy X

Photo by Ruth and Dave