Mandy Kloppers

How Older Couples Can Reignite Their Romance

When you’ve been with someone for many years, things can start to feel stale. You still love your partner, but you don’t feel the excitement and energy you once did. While many people assume the spark between two people is either there or it isn’t, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Maintaining a physical connection over a long period of time takes effort. As life happens, kids happen, family happens, it takes work to stay together and stay interested in each other.


It doesn’t matter if you got together in high school. Now you’re in your thirties trying to feel connected, or if you’ve spent a lifetime together and are now looking at your senior years, it is never too late to reignite the romance in your relationship. It is never too late for two people to fall in love again and feel the excitement they felt when they first met.


The good news is that even if things are feeling stale, you can reignite that flame. You can use the foundation of the love you feel for your partner and build a full and exciting existence together. You can spice things up in the bedroom, so you’re both having fun and enjoying being together. If you’ve been holding off planning a family when you’re older, you may need help reconnecting with your partner. Here are some ideas to get you started.


1. Surprise your partner.


Sometimes people get frustrated their partner is not as physical and outgoing as they used to be, but the reality is you stopped trying to impress and surprise your partner and making sure she feels loved. Surprising your love with flowers, breakfast in bed, or a trip to the jewelry store will make her feel loved and spoiled. Kendra Scott offers a wide selection of jewelry that ensures she’ll find something she loves. No matter how old a woman gets, it’s still great to feel spoiled.


Men like to be spoiled too. If you want to surprise your partner, cook his favorite meal, start his car on a cold morning when he has to go out, or walk through the room while he’s watching TV wearing something to catch his attention. Couples tend to get to the point when they stop expecting surprises or spontaneous gestures, and that is when some of the excitement goes away. Reignite that romance with a little spontaneity.


Plan a last-minute trip, and don’t tell your partner where you plan to go. Make it a romantic getaway at a secluded location. Arrange spa treatments, quiet dinners, and champagne. Plan out every detail to show her how much thought and excitement went into planning this time together. Effort can go a long way in creating a spark. People want to know they are wanted and valued. Regardless of age, when couples are together for many years, it’s easy for them to feel taken for granted. The effort shows how much you appreciate them and everything they have brought into your life. You could even consider going camping! It is an opportunity for you and your partner to disconnect from the endless routine of urban life, give each other your undivided attention, and enjoy each other’s company.

2. Renew your vows.

renew vows

Sometimes all it takes to reignite that flame is reminding her that you’d marry her all over again if given the option. Take her shopping for a new white dress, which will remind her of her wedding day and show appreciation for how much you have grown together as a couple. White House Black Market is a national retailer specializing in high-quality clothes that are both beautiful and flattering. Next, hit the jewelry store and buy her an anniversary ring that will compliment her wedding set.


If possible, go back to where you originally said your vows. If that isn’t possible, you can plan a new location based on your common interests and loves. You may decide to renew your vows at your home where you’ve shared a life. Invite friends and family to share the moment with you both and celebrate how much love you still have for each other.


Be sure also to plan a renewal honeymoon vacation to go on after the renewal ceremony. Many couples have low-key honeymoons due to their jobs, children, or financial situation when they first get married. When you’re a little older, you may be in a better position financially to go on the honeymoon of your dreams. Make sure it is a romantic trip with plenty of time set aside for relaxation. Consider a spa, resort, or retreat center for your honeymoon destination.


3. Try something new in the bedroom.

romantic bedroom

When you’ve been with the same person for several years, sex can start to feel routine. You both get into certain habits that are comfortable but not always exciting. Introducing new ideas in the bedroom can be intimidating because you don’t want your partner to think you aren’t happy. Start by finding new ways to please your partner. Reignite the flame with romance and fun, and see how your partner responds to you. You can learn how older couples have fun in the bedroom together. Sometimes this means finding new positions that are more conducive to physical health problems.


As people age, they often assume they are no longer sexy like they were when they were younger, which negatively impacts how they view sex. You have to go out of your way to let your partner know you still find him or her wildly sexy. Aging together is a beautiful thing that not many couples get to experience, so if you have that in your life, you need to cherish it and relish in the benefit you have of being intimate with someone who still wants to be with you even after years of being together.


Ask your partner what they would enjoy. Have an open conversation about desires and what you’ve each been too afraid to ask for. Explore new things in the bedroom and be completely open with each other. Intimacy in a relationship can be sensual and aid in reigniting the romance because intimacy makes people feel loved and safe on a deeper level.


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