Human Behaviour Mandy Kloppers

Faulty Thinking

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298/365: The Daily Dose Project by Pam Lau
298/365: The Daily Dose Project by Pam Lau (Photo credit: pamlau.com)

Faulty Thinking

Being practical and knowing how to get the heart of the matter and see things as they really are can help you immensely in life. Faulty thinking is one way in which many of us hold ourselves back. Here are a few examples of faulty thinking that we could all learn to do without:

 1) You can do anything and be anything you want

While  it is important to have a positive outlook on life and be open-minded about possibilities, it is possible to take this idea too far. Working with our strengths and weaknesses and capitalising on what we are good at is the way to move forward and be successful. There are different types of intelligence: some of us are creative; others are gifted in sports whilst others are very good at mathematics. No matter how hard some of us try and despite the well intentioned efforts of our parents and teachers, we will never reach the goals that we wish to achieve. The trick is to focus on your natural talents.

2) Everything happens for the best

There are many examples that I can think of where it is impossible to see that it happened for the best. for example: natural disasters, famine and poverty. There is immense suffering in the world and we are fooling ourselves by denying this. we do however have the choice to make the best out of a bad situation.

3) What will be will be

The above statement expresses the inevitability of some events, such as growing old, or that time marches on, or that the sun will rise every day. We take it for granted that certain things will be and that there is nothing we can do about some of them. The problem with this type of faulty thinking is that when we feel resigned to something happening, we can create a self fulfilling prophecy. Some people adopt a fatalistic attitude towards behaviours which involve risk or chance. This is faulty as we do have control over our reactions and behaviour.They will reason that there is no point worrying about the possibility of  an accident as it will only happen if fate intends it to be so-this suggests powerlessness against the future. As if their fate is controlled by some invisible force. It is almost as if they give away their power and surrender control over their lives when in fact, fate is more in our hands than we realise. Knowing the difference between what we can and cannot control is key.

4)  It’s the principle that counts

When we want to decide whether something is proper or improper, we tend to ask ourselves if it is morally correct.This view takes the position that an act is wrong simply because it has a degree of immorality connected to it. What is wrong with our behaviour is not the behaviour itself but the degree to which it exists. For example, if you always tell the truth in every detail because you believe that one lie is just as bad as a big one, you will be likely to lose friends. you might say the same about stealing, if sterling is bad then it doesn’t matter whether a person is caught stealing £1 or £100,000. The crime is the same. In reality, treating all misbehaviours alike ignores the context in which it occurred.

There are so many of our thought processes that involve faulty thinking. It is always important to remember that thoughts are not facts. We become accustomed to thinking about life in a certain way and learning to challenge our thinking is one of the best skills we can ever possess. Reality is often very different to our perceptions. Make sure that your perceptions lead to happy and fulfilling experiences instead of negative and dissatisfying experiences.

Mandy X

Mandy Kloppers
Author: Mandy Kloppers

Mandy is a qualified therapist who treats depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, trauma, and many other types of mental health issues. She provides online therapy around the world for those needing support and also provides relationship counselling.

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