Mental Health

Mandy Kloppers

Divorce is a Chance to Focus On You

Everybody has heard the statistics about divorce, but no matter how much you see it happen to other people, you probably never expected it to happen to you. Going through a divorce is often devastating and it’s important to take the time to grieve the loss of your marriage. However, it is also more important than ever to learn how to focus on yourself. 

Get Into Better Physical Shape

The healthier your body feels, the more confident you will be in yourself as you learn to navigate your new life and potentially even to date in the future. There is a wide range of ways to get into shape, such as a carb cycling workout plan. The plan you choose depends on what works for you. Ideally, you’ll eat plenty of healthy fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins. It’s also important to work out regularly, drink at least 64 ounces of water per day, and get enough rest at night. 

Prioritize Self-Care

Many people who go through a divorce throw themselves head-on into work, taking care of the kids, or other high-stress situations that leave them with little time to themselves. While this might seem helpful, it often simply pushes the negative feelings down until they become overwhelming. Prioritizing self-care is essential for your well-being. Say “no” to the extra hours at work and go home to read your favorite book instead. Leave the kids with a babysitter and spend a few hours pampering yourself or having a nice lunch alone. Even something as simple as creating a skincare routine can help you to practice self-care and feel better about yourself. 

Practice Acceptance

Most people don’t go into a marriage expecting it to end in divorce, and it’s likely that it’s been a shocking experience. While it’s natural to have regrets, it’s also important not to dwell on the past too much. Instead of focusing on “What could I have done differently?”, focus on “The divorce happened. Things did not go as planned, but I can still live a good life for myself.” If you have trouble changing negative thought patterns on your own, don’t be afraid to try therapy. Weekly or bi-weekly appointments are an excellent way to work through your feelings, regain your confidence, and go on to live in happier times. 

Spend Time With Your Friends and Family Members

Focusing on yourself doesn’t mean literally spending all of your time alone. It is important to connect with friends and family who can help you grieve, cheer you up, and act as the support system that you deserve during such a difficult time. Attend family get-togethers, go to brunch with your friends, and make an effort to be truly present. It’s also an excellent time to make new friends. Consider heading to a local paint night or another event that you’d find interesting and striking up a conversation with the people sitting nearest to you. You never know where friendship may bloom. 

Set New Goals For Yourself

Maybe your goals as a married person were to have dinner on the table every night or spend every Friday on a date with your then spouse. Now that you’re single, it’s time to set new goals for yourself. What have you always wanted to do? You could go back to school, apply for that job you’ve always wanted, or learn how to play a musical instrument. Maybe you’d like to visit all the tourist spots in your area, check out more live music, or go hiking. Whatever your interests are, now is the time to turn them into achievable goals

Divorce is the end of a big and important chapter of your life, but it is not the end of your entire life. By taking time to grieve, reaching out for support, and learning how to love yourself more than ever before, you can work through the hard emotions and come out brighter and happier on the other side.